There's More To The Story

We're trying to move on down here. It's been an exceptionally trying week, and it isn't over. And we're not the only one's hurting. Our neighbors saw their son's birthday come and go without him for the first time since his tragic death. He'd have been sixteen. Everybody hurts.

We've been blessed by an enormous outpouring of love and support from both our loved ones here in Valparaiso and our friends and loved ones in Macon. The church my mother and father in law belonged to was awesome in their warmth.

The musicians and soloist at the funeral were outstanding, even though they played a song my mother loved that was played at her funeral too that I've almost banned here because of how heart wrenching it is. There's never enough time though for the pastors to say everything they could. So let me tell you some of the rest of the story.

The life that Dot Clinard lived spanned over eight decades. She saw America change in ways that would have been unbelievable to her mother. Growing up in Albany GA, she came of age as America won the second World War. Pictures from that time show a beautiful young woman with a winning smile. She married a young man named Curtis Clinard, and was a faithful wife, loving companion, and supporter for the next 62 years. That's 62 years,or about 12.2 marriages in today's average. So it's clear that Dot understood love, marriage, and commitment - and lived it as her husband progressed in his sales career.

I've been a salesman. It's critical that you have confidence in yourself to succeed. There will be days when you don't close the sale when you know you needed to in order to provide better for your family. When you go home and your wife treats you like a winner regardless, you'll receive what you need to go back out and do it again. You'll do it better - for her. You want to make her proud. Trust me, it's a powerful motivator.

In Curtis' case, he wasn't just a salesman, he was a traveling salesman. Being on the road is a hard life anyway you slice it. Hard for the salesperson and hard for the ones you leave behind. It is extremely difficult.

It is impossible without an exceptional partner.

Dot was all that.

She gave birth to four children. Three boys, and despite her doctors objections that she shouldn't have any more children, a girl. They lived a life with Mom five days a week and a life with dad on the weekend. Always sounded overwhelming to me. I've been a boy, and helped raise two, and even being home - it was a challenge. One that she mastered. All four have grown up to raise families of their own, and were equipped to face the challenges life can throw at you. Each of them has known times when they were tested, and each has responded as they were taught.

It was news to me when I heard that Dot was baptized as an adult. Her faith was so much a part of who she was. Look, as a pastor I know that there are people who come because they are supposed to and people who come because they can't imagine anywhere else they'd rather be. And it is especially telling if people show up with their family when there's ever reason not to - like having four kids to get ready. And Dot had the kids there every time the doors were open and was a servant while she was there.

You heard people say "she makes everyone feel so comfortable, so welcome" or "she was so friendly" and granted, those are traits anyone can have. Occasionally. But you can't keep it up for decades unless there's more behind it than good intentions. It takes a heart tuned to the compassion of Jesus. That's that servant thing again.

That same heart that was turned to compassion had to be turned against sin and toward obedience. I don't mean forced obedience. I mean obedience by decision after decision as you lay your life down for Christ, for your husband, and for your family.

Dot was a beautiful woman. She had options. She chose Christ. She chose a life of sacrifice, a beautiful offering for her Savior lived through countless decisions to deny herself. It was costly, and she would have told you on any day - it was worth it all.

Yeah we miss her. Who wouldn't?

We'll see her again.

And the best way to live until we do is following Jesus in the everyday.

We've been pointed in the right direction.